Take Failure off the Table

“It [love] is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” (1 Corinthians 13:5 NIV)

I was recently at a wedding. It was a beautiful wedding, full of love and hope for the future.  They were confident, caring and so very much in love with each other.  Do you remember when that was your day? I do.

What happened?  What happened to that love, that devotion that we felt that day; the day we promised before God and man to love the other until death do we part? Then I remembered; life happened.  Bills and job, kids and colds, pride and selfishness happened.  Love has little to do with the lifespan of a marriage.  Falling in love is the easy part.  Even divorced couples say they still love their spouse.

Life throws a lot at us; but what we do with it determines our ultimate happiness.  It takes more than hard work to stay married today, it takes what others don’t have; it takes grace.  Extending grace to your spouse is one of the two unlocked keys to a successful marriage.  Always remembering that none of us are perfect and not expecting perfection from our spouse but instead, offering grace – grace that covers inequities – this is what is missing from the marriage.

The other key is taking failure off the table.  Couples who firmly and truthfully decide that divorce is not an option will find ways to get past the rough patches in their marriage.  When escape is an option, even a last resort option kept in the back of the mind, it erodes the marriage during hard times.  Take it off the table once and for all.  Decide to treat marriage is as a covenant that cannot be broken; the way God created it.  Experience true freedom in a marriage that cannot be broken. It will not be perfect, but it will be whole, and God will be pleased.

Lord, this marriage thing is hard but I have decided to take your covenant seriously and take failure off the table. I have decided that your Word is what I will stand my marriage on.  And I will show grace to the one whom I’ve devoted my life to.  I will show my spouse the grace I want to be shown to me. I will do all this in your son’s precious name.